A couple months ago, something in the sermon at church had me praying for prodigal children. As I was praying, I realized that I, too, was a prodigal of sorts. I have a prodigal heart.
Let me paint the picture. I have a great life. Surrounding me I have four wonderful, loving, compassionate, smart sons; gobs of friends who love and care for me emotionally and physically; a great family who has my best interests at heart; a warm and beautiful home filled with plenty of food and clothing for all of us. I have a relationship with God that continues to grow as He teaches me and prunes me and prepares me.
Yet, I want to wander. I want to take my inheritance and go, instead of waiting for the right time, God’s time, instead of completing the learning and training necessary to be a child of the Master. I want what I want, not just physically but emotionally, and I am willing to forsake the Plan for that. I am drawn by the open road, and want to do things the easy way, instead of the right way, God’s way. I am led astray by the foolishness of my own wayward, impatient heart that wants things that are not mine to have now, maybe not ever again…like a husband.
This is what I need: bubble wrap. I need to have bubble wrap around my heart, insulating it against the lures of the world, against the lures from within. Lures that draw me away from God’s plan will only cause heartbreak. Sometimes I need bubble wrap around my whole body.
I want the package of “me” to arrive safely at the Master’s feet, unharmed and untainted. I want to always want what He wants for me in my life. I want my life to be so wrapped up in becoming the Bride of Christ that everything else pales in comparison. No pun intended. This is the real deal, what I want, what I need, to strive for daily.
Show me your ways, LORD, teach me your paths. Guide me in your truth and teach me, for you are God my Savior, and my hope is in you all day long. -Psalm 25:4-5